Tag: Insightful

Secret of Bliss

“Secret of Bliss” by Holly Sheidenberger

Barb was mean.

Her husband left her long ago, and her children couldn’t wait to move out.

She cut her hair short and moved to the country with her Chihuahua.

Last March she treated herself to a visit to the City. She had been away too long.

She caught a peculiar sight: a woman pushing a dog in a baby stroller.

Enthralled, Barb followed the woman to a café.

The woman and her dog got a table, so Barb got a table too.

The woman cooed at the dog like a baby. She shared her food with it and let it lick her face. They both looked so happy.

Barb knew she had found the secret of bliss.

Now she dresses her Chihuahua in baby clothes and kisses it on the mouth.

Unfortunately, she is still mean.

Colt 45

“Colt 45” by Holly Sheidenberger

I am buying a coffee for my morning commute. He is buying a 40-ounce Colt 45 malt liquor. It’s 7:15 a.m.

Shattering the monotony, he whips out a gun and points it at the cashier. Everyone in the gas station screams.

I hate pansies who cower in front of guns on TV. So, I man up and grab the muzzle and twist it out of his hand.

It’s a .45 Colt. Ironic.

The guy drops his liquor in surprise. It explodes all over the floor.

He lunges for the gun, slips on the wet tile floor, and cracks his head on the ground. Blood seeps out everywhere, mingling with the alcohol.

He gurgles for a minute and then stops. I think he’s dead.

Twenty minutes later I’m at the office. Bob fake smiles, “Good morning. How are you?”

I fake smile back. “Fine, how are you?” and head to my cubicle to start my day.